Different Values

Dr. Robert Priest of Trinity International University has a definition of culture. It goes: Culture is composed of beliefs and values that are taught, learned and perpetuated.

Yesterday, we hosted a pancake breakfast on a reservation. Kids were still out of school, and we thought we could really serve the community by giving them a nice breakfast and a chance to gather on happy circumstances.
We did one about six months ago and it went very well. It did get off a little rough, since the person assigned to open the building didn't show up with the key. We got a late start, but managed to be ready enough by the time the people arrived.
We made sure that a key holder would be there on time for yesterday. We called ahead the day before to make sure the arrangements were in place. They were, we were told. So, we arrived at the building and it was locked. We waited,...and waited....and finally called our contact person on the cell phone. The contact person was also expected to be at the building at 0915 hours to make the coffee and the juice. We learned that they had just left to go to town to buy the juice. We were told to go to "so and so's house, they will have a key." So, Jannie went to the house and asked for the key. She was told that just the day before, someone had borrowed the key and hadn't returned it, but perhaps "so and so" down the road has a key, so try there. Jannie hiked to the next house. A young boy still in wearing underwear and his hair disheveled opened the door to greet the sight of a tall white woman looking down at him. "MOM!!...There is someone at the door!!!" His mother appeared around the corner and rescued the boy from the door job. No doubt a relief for him. She found a key and gave it to Jannie. We lost forty minutes of start up time just waiting to get into the building. We needed that time to get a head start on the pancakes and sausages.
The key we were given only opened up the front door. It didn't give access to the storage closet with the tables and chairs. That door was securely locked. (I could have popped the hinge pins and removed the door, but rejected the idea...). So, the eating area had only two tables, and three chairs. As ten o'clock arrived, so did the people. We had enough food prepared, and made the coffee, but the lady with the juice hadn't arrived yet, though it had been forty minutes since we talked with her and the distance from town was only four minutes.
Some of the people that came were known to us. We hadn't seen each other in months, so the breakfast seemed worth it in just reconnecting with those people. We also made a few more new friends, which was a blessing.
An hour and a half "late", the contact person arrived with the juice. She announced that there was a hockey game between the USA and Canada, and they HAD to see it. She opened up the closet and we set up the tables and chairs. Nothing more was said, as that declaration carried the weight of the culture.
So, even though we had an arrangement, and the success of the breakfast depended on opening up the building, setting up the tables and chairs, and getting the food and beverage ready "on time", somehow...that came secondary to seeing a hockey game on TV. In the eyes of the community, it was a success. They saw a hockey game and had a good breakfast.
Culture is made up of values and beliefs that are taught, learned and perpetuated. Our "white culture" puts a high value on the use of time. Starting on time is a value. I remember one time, a pastor telling me that I had four minutes to make a ministry presentation in church; if I went over that, a trap door would open and I would drop from behind the pulpit. Sometimes the "white culture" lives under a tyranny of the clock. It that right? Our culture says it is. Native culture does not live under the tyranny of the the clock. Artists, philosophers, and photographers understand this. You can't create an event, you have to show up and be there when it happens. Sounds a bit like the story Mary and Martha, doesn't it? (Luke 10:38-42) Martha is busy trying to create and event. She is filled with stress and distress as time ticks away. Mary is content to "show up and go with the flow."
I have to tell you the truth, because I know someone is wondering, "Doesn't the Native view of time bug you?"
I found myself like Martha, getting frustrated and edgy. This event was planned, confirmed, and once again, "they" couldn't even show up on time. So I prayed and turned it over to the Lord. It was like the Lord quieted my spirit and said, "Howard, your cultural values on time are driving you nuts. Don't worry about it! You showed up, and you are doing the best you can, so guard your heart and your attitude so you won't miss the opportunities when they happen." We did, and the "event" ended up as a blessing for the community and for us, too. :)